Apologies

Published on by freefallingintoasoberlife

I haven’t posted for awhile.  No particular reason-although we are down to one computer right now which my SO commandeers most of the time.  So I get on it when he’s away…

As I’ve previously written, I have a love-hate relationship with catering.  Which I’ve done forever.  But, I can’t seem to totally break from it.  For one thing the money’s good when I do it-well for the most part.  And, I pretty much just do things for people that I have been doing events for for years.  So there’s a comfort level there.  Well as much as there can be. Anyway, I did a small dinner party for a longtime client the other night.  I really like them and politically, we’re in total agreement-which I can’t say about most of my ultra wealthy clientele.  So as I was getting things in order, the husband came in to get a glass of white wine for a guest.  He pulled out a bottle from the fridge that was about half empty-he poured some, tasted it asked what I thought-Now this was the kind of wine that I used to LOVE! I said I didn’t drink anymore.  His response? “I’m sorry!” Wow! Then a bit later, his wife came in, poured herself a Scotch and told me if I wanted one or a glass of wine, to help myself.  I told her that I didn’t drink anymore (not that I ever drank at an event while working. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever had a glass of wine with these people).  Anyway, her response was the same as her husband’s!  She said, “I’m sorry!”

That blew me away.  These folks are not alcoholics-well not that I know of.  I’ve seen them a bit buzzed at the end of an evening, but have never had the sense that they knock it back on a nightly basis. But then again, what do I know?  I’m not there every night.  As it was getting closer to the guests being seated for the first course, the husband came in to open the wine and decant it so it could breathe.  As he was pouring it into the carafe, he made a statement that the wine cost almost as much as the food!  Let me tell you, for a small seated dinner, I charge ALOT! Well over $150.00 a person (see why I do it?) That’s just for the food-not the service or gratuity.  So this was for 8 guests. Do the math! And I thought I spent a ton on vino!! Crazy!

Don’t you think it’s strange that their response to my saying I don’t drink anymore is that they’re “sorry”?  Jeez! I have such a nice rhythm to my life now.  Yes, occasionally, I wish I could join in for the wine.  But that passes.  I have never woken up the morning after going out the night before and wished that I had partaken of an alcoholic beverage-Of course it wouldn’t have been just one alcoholic beverage.  It would have been several. Or more.  And, I HAVE woken up many times and wished I hadn’t had any alcohol the night before. Yes, I smelled the $800.00 bottle of wine.  Yes, it smelled good.  Was I tempted?  Not at all. I just got on with what I needed to do.  At the end of the evening, I was tired.  But, I got home in time to watch Saturday Night Live-and see this new “regime” we are under here in the US get skewered once again.  Had a Perrier. In the past, I would have opened a bottle of wine to “unwind”.

I know that I’ve written about the freedom that comes when getting sober.  But, I can’t stress enough how great that freedom is.  Yes, I could lose about 8 pounds.  I should work out more. I should cut back on sugar.  I hate the political situation here and am completely stressed and obsessed by it.  Yes, we have some concerns over the Great British Pound going down because of Brexit.  I have fucked up family members.  But I don’t have the ball and chain around me in the shape of a wine bottle on top of everything else. And that my friends, is blissful!

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18 thoughts on “Apologies”

  2. Please don’t apologise.. I so look forward to your e- mails.. They are so insightful and to know that you have managed stop drinking and reached the ‘ other side’ makes me so envious.. Simple yes? Yes in theory.. A moment of clarity… Post breast cancer..still struggle.. Sorry because I know you can’ t give me the answer…I need to decide that it’s ‘ time’ .. Anne ________________________________

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  3. Spoken most definitely by people who don’t “get it”

    I get it! It’s more than something to be sorry about. No one should look down on me because I have to be sober anymore. I have much more fun anyway than I used to while drinking. Appreciate catching your perspective on that interaction you had.

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  5. I think sometimes people don’t know what to say. Sorry may just be a polite way of saying “I am not sure if that’s a good or bad thing, but I need to say something” kind of thing. Meh. But they sounded pretty cool about it. And I work in the industry (chef) and yeah, sometimes I take a whiff of the wine and for a microsecond I think – whoa nice, but really, I know those days are done. 99% of the time, I don’t even think of the booze I use regularly as booze. It’s just an ingredient.

    And to your point of whether to know whether your clients were alcoholics or not – they had half a bottle of wine in the fridge. What alcoholic leaves any part of a bottle around??? ha ha.

    Paul

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  6. So good to hear from you!
    I love, love, love the freedom I have not drinking!
    Drinking people just can’t understand why anyone would be sober. (I used to agree with them.)
    As far as the news?
    I try not to watch too much, and I can get so upset, hubs has to calm me down!
    xo
    Wendy

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  8. Lovely post. $800 for a bottle of wine!!!! WTF Seriously almost just swallowed my tongue. This is so weird that people would pay that amount of money for what is a basically just fermented grapes. Bet you can tell I was never a wine connoisseur. I was a wine drinker:)

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  9. I used to apologize for not drinking. “I’m sorry, but I am not drinking at the moment.” And I really was sorry. No more! I am not sorry, and I don’t want to give the impression that I’m secretly lusting after their drink. I think most people think you’ve had a kidney removed, or something else awful, if you don’t drink anymore. It couldn’t possibly be by choice.
    I so hear ya on the politics. And I live in the States, where it is clearly insane. I would so much rather be at one of your catered dinners. ; )

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